Hope 2.0:Toward the end of my marriage over 3 years ago, things were not amazing, for the first time in my life I legitimately considered the option that ending my life would be an easy solution to my problem.  I could choose to get off simply. No more tears, no more pain, just skip the queue of life and be done. It was a daily thought for quite some time, and in extremely rare low moments even still, it creeps into my thoughts.  I could skip the queue, but in turn I'd also skip the wonder life has in store for me and cause pain to others. I obviously didn't choose this road years ago, nor will I, but the memory is there. Now I don't share this intimate detail because I want help or sympathy, this post isn't about me exactly. It's about my brother who was in a roll over accident last week, too many stitches and staples to count, but he lived and he is fine. It's about Sylvia. An island beauty who married my amazing cousin Shawn a few years ago. She is the mother of a darling baby boy who started walking a few months ago, and she has a heart that I could only dream of. Soft, kind, angelic, she is a woman unparalleled in her abundant goodness. I wish we lived closer because she is a friend and an example. She is a 20-something woman, vibrant and lovely, that was just diagnosed with stage 4 terminal cancer. In a matter days, being tired and not feeling like herself, has turned into an expiration date. The doctors have really know way of knowing how many years, they can just accurately diagnose, and manage the situation as best they can. News of Nick's accident, news of Sylvia's diagnoses, is devastating. News like this stops your flippant careless thoughts, and grounds you. News like this makes you value everything, and all the nothings that don't really matter, stop mattering.  You want to hold people close, love a little more, but mostly, just breath in and live in today. Skipping the queue and choosing to end life early, is such a supremely real, yet selfishly stupid thought. Life comes with abundant joy and wonder, it also comes with so many challenges, some seemingly insurmountable.  I try my best to remain grounded by the hope that: life is catered to each individual, there is a greater plan, a greater good, most things happen for a reason, and love and family (whether by blood or association) will be what get you through.