Monday, July 18, 2011

Beach Wedding? Really

So Saturday morning came around 5:45am and I thought, "yes stay in bed all day, you have no commitments. you can go to the market, read a book, shave your legs, organize your hard drive" and next thing I knew I was shuffling about for a swim suit, sunscreen, yoga pants, and shades. I jumped in the shower, shaved my legs (1 thing off my original list), cut up mangos, smelly French cheese, and celery-because that was all that was in my fridge- and before I knew it I was on the road. Lewes, DE my favorite non-exotic exotic location. Quick stop at Food Lion for some water and a People magazine and I was there, at the end of the 404 right by the Dairy Queen on the beach by 8:30.
8:30 is a titch early but I wanted to beat Bay Bridge traffic, mission accomplished. I set up for the day and half way into Jaycee Dugard's hauting People article this happened....
Beach wedding. Charming? Well.....Lewes, DE is as mentioned before not exotic. It is the first city in the first state but the sand is rough, the water is murky, the Ferry is constantly honking upon its arrival or departure, and if you get married here you might have the lifeguards doing their morning bikini clad run right behind the priest during your ceremony. But thank you for choosing this destination, it made my Saturday morning more eventful than planned. I was 15 feet away observing from my towel.

New Leaf

I don't feel "sage" as they say in French, 28 years old yet I feel eternally 17. I am thinking my mantra for life should be, "I've fallen and I can't get up" . I seem to find myself in complicated situations often receiving hard cancel as my only resolution. I am not offended or saddened by this, I welcome a challenge and realize I am hard nut to crack. Many I know love to feel grounded, they find safety and solace in knowing there roots are deep in the earth holding them steady. I am not this way...I am more like those air plants you see in tourist shops that they make into fridge magnets, you know these guys (more scientifically known as the genus Tillandsias with about 540 species belonging to the bromeliad family)....
yep that's me on the right, sticking out a bit and no roots. I find I am happiest in chaos when the world is spinning around me and there are millions of things to do. Don't make me out to be a total disaster, I love peace and calm just like the next guy but there is so much wonder in this world I find it hard at times to "sit still". My dreams surpass my abilities however, I have yet to quench the desire to continue on this path of complexity and chaos.

Friday, July 15, 2011


My entire life I have heard to never compare myself to others.....ya right, can't help it. The past few weeks have left me a bit numb(?) as I have selfishly spent too much time looking at how old I am and wondering: is this what I wanted to do? didn't I want kids by this time? didn't I want a PhD? didn't I want to have a few more stamps in the passport? didn't I want to have completed 2 triathlons and be able to speak 5 languages? and then I found this......

we must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us
{joseph campbell}

and I felt a little better. I am not sure how "willing" I am (ask anyone and they may say I am more stubborn or headstrong) however, I have created a little niche and while it has evolved from my juvenile life plan, it suits me just fine.