Single: I am the 3rd of 5 children, and the only one not married. {Let's just be clear, I am happy and thriving single I write about it, because it's what I know} When I am home, my marital status is quite often the subject of conversation. This past trip to Utah was particularly great. I will share some of the highlights with you....I do this not out of spite or want for change, I do this because my family is hilarious.

Mom: "Do you realize you can quantify the men in you life who have recently shown interest as,  in their 40's or gay? "

Jen{oldest sister, while shopping}: "You are single because you aren't sexy! No guy wants cute. You just need to dress more sexy......ahhhh put that shirt down! See that is what I am saying, you think that looks cute, but it's just not sexy. You are single because of the way you dress, you should let me help you."

Beth {older sister, while talking to her about the guy from church who is darling but dating a girl in the Philippines}: " If you like him, you should just propose! I mean just do it, you shouldn't have to wait around, so what if he has a girlfriend, he isn't proposing. you should. I always thought you would."

Mom {after I literally hid behind her when a very drunk Serbian guy started talking to me}: "Oh I had no idea, you are still shy? What was that? You really are terrible at flirting."

So I suppose in my free time I need to work on attracting heterosexual men by: a. dressing sexier, b.proposing to them, and/or c.learning to flirt. If sexily clad giggling doesn't work, I have compiled a list, mostly for myself, of useful things I can do. I can:

change the oil in my car*drive a 21' uhaul sans fear*back up a trailer*make a pie*shine shoes*recite the preamble*touch my toes*plant a successful garden*swim a mile*assemble Ikea furniture right the first time*change a diaper*tie a tie*parallel park a motor home*eat spicy thai food*lay a level brick patio*decorate a room*house train a dog*make jam*ski*sew*download software updates*drive a standard or automatic, while knowing the difference*properly capture, kill, pin, and scientifically identify most insects*waltz/salsa/rhumba*kill a starling with a gun*sleep on a plane*read a physical map*set up a tent*speak french*make chicken wings*moonwalk*set a proper table*play the piano*tape and paint a room*ride a horse*drive a boat*walk in high heels