Should Have Been:a friend was looking through my phone today and she said, "do you have any normal photos of yourself?" well I guess not....

if I were a princess I would have a royal photographer who would take thousands of "normal" pictures....but I am not so I have this instead, and I am alright with that.

Possible: is it possible to be any more in love with Ikea? Oh ya it's possible. Went in for a new Duvet ended up with a new duvet and this....

Rebound:yes I am doing it again, unloading little details about my personal life...when you get divorced, people out of pure curiosity, always! want to know the reason. In my case, some people asked if I had an affair, spoiler alert [! hell no], but if I had known this stuff existed I may *have.

Meet Boylan, my newest addiction/rebound. Isn't he dreamy....

and he pairs so well with nachos and **these:

*yes I know you can't have and affair with creme soda, and yes I know a love for creme soda won't end a marriage. Thanks

**no I am not binging on crap and blowing up like a ballon, I just happened to have these recently and thought they deserved recognition.

Stuff it Maria:Sound of music is great but really? really? rain drops on roses? kitty whiskers? blue belts? really those are your favs? well these are mine: 1. my *sextuple mac and cheese, 2. paying for parking on my phone-no digging for quarters under car floor mats anymore!, 3. med-rare steak, 4. Aisics, 5. this yogurt with lemon peel in it, and 6. over easy eggs.

1. 2.

3. 4. 5.

6.

*yep had to phone a friend for that word. Thank you Doctor

E.T. phone home: so on my way out of town last weekend I stumbled upon this...ya I felt like I should've been wearing a grey hoodie driving behind this...

Wendy: yep I've known her for a decade+ and I keep her around because:

1. 2.

1. when she asks me to come help her find new bedding, I find her this instead and when I say, "put this on I am taking your picture" she knows resistance is futile so she does it!

2. when we finish shopping and I see something sparkly by the car and it happens to be 2 Lindt truffles in a pile of leaves, I totally pick them up and they seem dry so I unwrap one and hand it to her, unwrap the other and we pop em in our mouths, without hesitation. Free chocolate? She's all over that!

*thanks for a few laughs and way too many "that's what she saids" tonight*

Cleveland Rocks: for those of you who hail from Cleveland you may not think this, you may think that song is dead wrong. It is now a post industrial city where the main industry is Metro, the trauma hospital!! I see it slightly different, I am a lover of all food, this is not new information, but I especially love market food.....A few weeks ago I planned a little trip to Cleveland and I googled the city to see what the official food of Cleveland was, there is no "official food" but a whole lotta sites were yammering about pierogies. Later in the doctors office's magazine I found this...

and thought, " how perfect, I can eat market pierogies on pierogy day in the pierogy city"! And that is exactly what I did. I also had market empanadas.

I am all about ambience and market food eaten on benches in the back by the trash as crowds pass, with fantastic company just seems like the thing to do.

Oh we had tamales too.

Definition: I think it is important to be able to look at yourself in a constructive way and determine who you are, what you want, and what is getting in your way. And I mean doing so in an honest way not this:

"I am Monica and I am 28 I really love my family,

I like myself and my church,

my favorite color is pink

but sometimes green,

I want to be

a mommy someday

to a bunch of little kiddos:)" BARF!!

That gets you no where! The whole purpose of honestly asking yourself those questions it to identify what is standing in the way of who you are and what you want and making a plan for how you can become something better than you are today so you can achieve your "wants". It isn't something that can be done necessarily quickly and the fixing sometimes takes as long as the actual realization of the problem. Now, I will not share with you my entire definition because frankly getting to know some my weakness' alone hurts enough and I don't need all of you to be in on it too! and tooting my/your own horn is just wildly unattractive. But I will share this....

" I am Monica, I am 28 and I am a bit of a bad ass

(ya I wrote ass not a*% get over it)

because today while

showering I turned around to

see a spider crawling up my shower

wall arachnophobia style and instead of screeching and jumping

out,

without blinking I smashed that sucker

with my bare hands.

Then I rinsed, repeated, conditioned and took this picture:"

(look at the upper right hand corner to see the carnage)

Men: yep I am finally getting it, I get the fear of commitment, I get the not wanting to settle down, I am starting to understand.....understand that it is all a bunch of bull crap! you aren't afraid of commitment you just enjoy being selfish, living the bachelor life, watching movies on your laptop while eating pizza in bed without commentary. That I get. So consider me now one of the guys, I have a "fear of commitment" and I don't want to "settle down". translation incase you missed it: I really enjoy eating pizza in bed alone at 10:pm while watching a movie, I am not really afraid I am just enjoying my new found peace as a newly single

Birthdays: not sure why exactly but I hate mine. I don't want the cake, I don't want the candles, the singing, the presents, I just want the day to come and go. I love however, to celebrate other's birthdays. Odd?yes I know. Last night-no it was not my birthday-I was out with Wendy and experienced a familiar something that would make anyone detest their birthday, the "Happy Birthday" song sung at a chain restaurant. This experience brings to question, why would you choose to have your "special" day celebrated by allowing a bunch of tone-deaf, musically illiterate servers sing, or if you are lucky sing and clap, to you and then drop a Sysco brownie with dream whip and a candle in front you?